Alex Saxton

3 Tips to Stop Intrusive Thoughts About Your Relationship

Are you currently grappling with intrusive thoughts that are seriously affecting your relationship and sabotaging it? For example, are you doubting whether your partner is right for you or if you are right for them? Or are you constantly comparing yourself to their exes, simply never feeling good enough in comparison?  Or do you have an excessive fear of abandonment in your relationship? And no matter how much overthinking, ruminating, persistent questioning or reassurance seeking on the matter are you still battling with the same intrusive thoughts 24/7?

If so you may have relationship OCD which is a subtype of obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) that is characterised by intrusive and distressing thoughts, impulses, and repetitive behaviours related to romantic relationships Individuals with relationship OCD may experience excessive worry, doubt, and preoccupation regarding their relationships, which can significantly impact their emotional well-being and daily functioning. If any of this sounds familiar, I recommend you read this article for advice on getting over relationship OCD. 

On a personal note, I know relationship OCD firsthand after suffering for many years, and I’m not going to sugarcoat my experience,- having ROCD destroyed many of my relationships. But I’m here to tell you if I can get through it and thrive in healthy romantic relationships, so can you! Here is my advice on how to deal with these anxiety-producing intrusive thoughts:

1. Avoid seeking reassurance from your partner or friends, or engaging in any self-reassurance about whether they are right for you or vice versa. Try to also refrain from overthinking or ruminating about the topic and making comparisons, as these behaviours may provide short-term relief but can perpetuate the cycle of intrusive thoughts. Resisting the urge to seek reassurance may be difficult at first, but it can help break the habit of reassurance-seeking. It will feel hard at first but don’t give up because the urge to think, ruminate or reassurance seek are all habits in your subconscious mind that you created over time. What happens when you don’t practice habits? They fade!

2. Be mindful of how the intrusive thoughts may manifest in different forms. Initially, they may involve worries about your relationship or fear of abandonment, but they can evolve into new intrusive thoughts that are ultimately seeking reassurance about your relationship. If you are unsure if these new thoughts are intrusive or not, then, pay attention to how you feel. Do you get this strong urge or anxiety to go back to those thoughts? Like they’re pulling you back in. Chances are, they’re probably just another one of those sneaky intrusive OCD thoughts trying to mess with your peace of mind and need to be avoided at all costs!

3. Another solution for how to stop repetitive intrusive thoughts, is to challenge the CORE beliefs in your subconscious mind that created your relationship OCD in the first place. Such as fear of abandonment, low self-esteem, or need for absolute certainty. One way to challenge these beliefs is by using daily affirmations. E.g. for fear of abandonment, you can create affirmations that focus on fostering feelings of security, self-worth, and trust instead. Changing core beliefs in your subconscious mind using affirmations is a gradual process that requires daily dedication and consistent effort, so be patient!

Last words

If you need extra help in changing CORE beliefs in your subconscious mind that fuel your OCD, then my hypnotherapy services may be what you are looking for. My service consists of subconscious mind reprogramming, during which I can help reshape the CORE beliefs that are not serving you anymore.  Which makes escaping from OCD’s tight grip a lot easier! Check out my “Hypnosis for OCD Relief”  professional service to hear more about how to overcome relationship OCD using my hypnotherapy service. I can help you to feel calmer and reduce the annoying intrusive thoughts and the urge to perform compulsions of reassurance seeking or ruminating over the topic. To find out more – click this link

Alternatively, you can go straight to booking a call with me to hear about my services in more, during the call I will also be running some useful hypnosis tests to check your suitability to my hypnosis technique before any commitment to sessions is made, here is the link to book

My Bio

Hi, I’m a clinical hypnotherapist with over 15 years of experience, and to date, I have helped over 100 clients from London, Poole, Bournemouth,  Southampton, Bath,  Bristol, the United States, and as far afield as New Zealand in overcoming anxiety and OCD. Regardless of where you reside,  I am fully equipped to assist you in the same manner so do get in touch if you need my hypnosis help. Here is the link to my website for more information.